Editor’s Note: after reading this and having a friend comment that it didn’t flow, I’d like to say that the whole point I’m trying to make here is that you shouldn’t listen to all the people who tell you what not to do. I apologize in advance. This post kind of sucks but it IS my turn.
What are words for, when no one listens anymore? (Missing Persons reference. I’m sure you caught it.)
There’s a fairly inane little article in MarketingProfs about 100 words you shouldn’t use in an email subject line, although it’s not much more than a list without any explanation of why these words are so bad. I can’t be arsed to test whether or not certain subject lines will really get your email blocked though, even though I may write to Mythbusters to see what they can do. What’s the SEO angle on this? Obviously there are plenty of ways of getting around the rules, which we all know a lot about and that’s a good thing. So there you go…and here you go.
Obviously you know that there are certain words that you can’t use in Google Adwords, for example. For such a totalitarian group of fascists (and yes I really am using some hyperbole), they aren’t all that fond of superlatives. They’re also not fond of ads for gambling but I know plenty of people who’ve gotten around that, at least for a bit before they get caught, so here is why you should completely ignore yet another so-called rule: this is all a game to see who can last the longest.
Being somewhat argumentative, yet still a delicate flower, I tend to want to do whatever someone tells me not to do. Immediately, usually. It’s childish, I’ll admit, but the minute I am prohibited from doing something, I have an overwhelming urge to do it, especially if it involves cursing or drinking or spending money (what are commonly referred to as my three graces.) The web is chock full of blogs and sites telling you what not to do, and that’s all fine and lovely and beatific BUT it’s also geared towards the mainstream people who follow the rules without question.
I really do have a point here, I promise.
Following rules is definitely a good thing in many instances. If something is for the greater good, then I’ll do it if I can keep my dress on. There’s a fine line, though, and the fear-mongering that we see online is really wreaking havoc on the way that so many people conduct their online business. I understand the argument against cloaking, for example, but I still think it’s fine in many cases. And really, who’s been mutilated and left for dead by a cloaked page? You may have been misled but if being misled is the worst thing that ever happens to you, my congratulations. You’re an ass-ton luckier than anyone else.
So why do we have such an overwhelming amount of advice about how to stay orderly and look at the back of the neck of the person in front of you? Nothing good can come of that, I assure you. Just keep your minds open when you read this crap (and when you read the crap we write too.) I’d be in less of a mood if I were writing this and listening to something other than Sisters of Mercy but really, I get quite sick of constantly reading about all the things we shouldn’t do or say, especially when there is no explanation offered. I guess you can’t really argue when someone doesn’t give you an explanation…is that the point then? Do it. Follow the rules, don’t question them. Feck arse.
The good thing about this whole mess is that it does tend to make people get a bit more creative…black hats wouldn’t be nearly as cool if they weren’t subverting the dominant paradigm you know. I mean seriously, Esrun is only interesting to me because I know what he can do. OK that’s a joke…his deviance is fascinating too. You think John Lydon follows the rules? Yes I know he’s annoying. OH! Irrelevant but where else can I interject this? I’m off Adam Ant after seeing him cry in the video for “Wonderful.” What grown man cries in a video? I am so embarrassed, I can’t even link to it.