Ah, another meme, that lovely bit of viral marketing that gets you up off your arse and forces you to write!
I was tagged by Chris Hambly, social media god…if you’ve not yet read his blog, do so. Not only will you get useful industry information, you’ll also get some nice commentary on the state of affairs in England. My topic is 8 Random Things About Me, which is truly perfect since I am nothing if not random.
1. I am deathly afraid of alligators, crocodiles, and sharks, even though I never go anywhere near them unless they’re properly put up away from me. They scare me so badly that I have nightmares about them maybe once a week. If I ever fall into the middle of the ocean or a swamp in Louisiana, I’ll die of shock before anything eats me luckily. If I lived in Florida, I wouldn’t even have a pet door in case some 8 feet long alligator would come in and I’d get up in the middle of the night and step over it, not wearing my glasses, thinking it was one of my dogs.
2. I would never transport Dracula at night or eat candy apples, coconut, or mayonnaise. All those things are just foolhardy. Actually, I may add fennel to that list, after having what was basically fennel stew with a raw egg on top of it at some posh place in Durham, NC.
3. I have never had a cavity…neither has my father or my paternal grandmother. My dentist HATES me and it’s not just because I told him that his hygienist should have his salary since he does f%&^ all. He also has silly facial hair.
4. Drawing a perpendicular to things makes more sense to me than drawing a parallel. It’s also really confusing to bystanders to say “well let me draw a perpendicular to it for you” and then that’s just free comedy. It’s the main reason why I sometimes say things like “hooray, hooray the cat lives!” when someone asks the time.
5. I assume that when I don’t know someone’s last name, it must actually be Spivey. It’s highly unlikely, statistically speaking, but still…what an awesome freaking surname.
6. I’d really like to own chickens and raise them as pets (with the proper paid help naturally and a state of the art chicken coop that is built in the same Victorian style as my house), and maybe walk one (at a time, or else it would be nuts) on a leash down the street. People would get out of your freaking way if you had a Rhode Island Red on a damn leash wouldn’t they? They could live out back with the dogs and I’d walk outside past them and gesture towards them grumpily saying “chickens here” like Tim Roth did when he played van Gogh. Unfortunately, a giant bloodhound makes everyone on the planet want to stop to talk to you. A chicken? Not so much.
7. If I like a song, I’ll listen to it over and over and over again until I’ve heard it so much, I can’t stand it any more and don’t listen to it for about a year. This is why I hate so much music. Currently I’m doing this with Say Hi’s “Let’s Talk About Spaceships” and F.U.’s “Young, Fast Iranians.”
8. I think that a boxed Chef Boyardee pizza mix is truly one of life’s ultimate pleasures. However, I’ll only make one if no one else is home, lest I have to share it. Everyone makes fun of the Chef, yet their hands are out with plates when you start dishing it out.
And here we go with the “tag, you’re it” bit…
Gene Wicker Jr.
Shana Albert aka The Nanny
Nic and Cher (yes both of them–they are both so freaking cute)
Any one of the SEO Blokes, all of whom are morons, none of whom ever write
Jonathan Pritchard-Barrett
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Julie! What does this have to do with SEO? Your fired!! I’m only kidding, I can’t fire you…. Your the best!!
I have never had Chef Boyardee Pizza mix… but now I am going to have to try it.
@Stephanie: absolutely nothing. I’ve drawn a perpendicular to SEO with this post.
Hey Julie,
Oooh, a meme… I haven’t done one of these things in a while. Sounds like fun and I accept the challenge.
Your alligator fear is kind of mine too, but for very dysfunctional reasons. My father use to play something called “Gator-Gator” with me and my sister when we were young. My sister and I would crawl into our parent’s bed in the early morning hours on a weekend. Sounds really sweet, right? Here is the dysfunctional part… We had a dog who would sleep on our parents floor. Well, my dad would lift us up in the air and say, “Oh, no… Gator-Gator is going to get you” and my sweet dog, Missy would be barking and nipping at my sister and my fingers and toes. I remember this game being fun and scary at the same time… kind of like a roller coaster. Oh, what parents do to their children.
Thanks for the tag and I will write something up shortly.
@Shana: Excellent! That’s a good idea about how to torment my kids actually…haha!
Oh dear, I read number 6 as being “I’d really like to own chickens and raise them as pets (with the propeller hats naturally . . .) - I immediately thought ‘how cool!’ then, re-read it, no chookens in hats
If I ever have chickens mine are going to have propeller hats
@Tricia: yes chickens in propeller hats…that’s the only way to do it. I’ve seen the light.
So Julie, I guess you wouldn’t have wanted to be there when I took this in Florida last Christmas?
@Jane: or should I say @theMasochist?
Holy shite. I would have dropped the camera, did a girl scream, and run like the wind. I guess that one didn’t eat you, but watch out for the next one!!
He was an impressive little bastard. Got to within about six feet of him before survival instincts too over and we hoofed it for the car.
Thank goodness you lived!!! He looks mean, like he’d eat Kiwis for a starter.
Two other things:
1) I’ve never had braces and I have almost-perfect LOOKING teeth. There’s been plenty of money spent behind the scenes, since I have the opposite luck with cavities.
2) Why do I have to go into Wordpress and moderate my own comments when I’m signed in? Is this because of that time you “accidentally” marked me as spam?
@Jane: I really don’t know why you have to approve your comments…that is insane. I’ve had to approve a lot of Judith’s as well.
You do have perfect teeth and I do not like that ONE bit. You have perfect hair too. I’ll stop now, lest anyone starts a rumor.
HHHHHaaaa - I feel like I’ve not known a thing about you Mrs Julie. Love the idea of chickens with propeller hats - that would so turn heads. Mind you - if you had to do this in the UK, you’d probably be arrested by animal protection and then paraded in the same propeller hat as an example to all mankind… what good news that would be.
This has got to be the most random post so far - but boy did I laugh!
Hey - I’ve always wanted to be able to take my cat into town on a leash… she’s giving me the evil look…
@Anita: yes it really was a random post…glad you laughed. Glad you aren’t blocking me on Facebook and deleting me from your IM. Is Andre? Haha!
I freakin love #6. I can just imagine you walking around with a chicken. Hilarious!
Oh and I think Lisa Spivey would be a cool name haha…I’m bored of Ditlefsen. No one can freakin pronounce it anyway. Was at the Doctors the other day and they yelled out DICKlefsen…AGH!! Thought I might take my mums surname but that’s not ANY better as it’s Koxvig…LOL…unlucky..
Maybe the next blog we do can be the Spivey Sisters.
Hey, stop bad-mouthing the SEO Blokes.
I won’t blog on the site for another month now that you’ve said that.
Wow, I had no idea any of the Blokes were still online.
SEO Blokes is like one of those pre-dotcom crash sites that you really loved but that sadly went the way of the dodo. I think they should change the title tag, at least.
hahahaha!!! Well they’d need technical know-how and talent to do that…
The chef is a god - I worship his cookie dough.
Mind, it doesn’t like me so much and my body hates me with a passion when I eat the cookies but wow… what a way to go, hunh?
Nic n Cher Spivey…. genius
I think that, at the next conference, we should all be “so and so Spivey”
@Lisa I always loved the way my Weegie friends would introduce themselves. ‘Yes my name is Stig, really’ or ‘Hello my name is Snorre but you can call me Jon.’
Quite often at parties they would have to pull out their passports to show that yes, Bente, Haavard and Asbjoern are real names
Liking the idea of the Spivey Sisters - sounds like a doo-wop styled girl group.
Hmmm… deCabbit Spivey… not quite got that ring of coolness about it…
Spivey Sisters - that has to be done as a karaoke group!
LOL
I can help you with #6 - Let me know if you want to take Packock out for a walk
Viva Packock!!! He’s very sporty. I’d love to walk him…I am quite envious now.