Blogging Can Be Deadly

Yes, it’s true.  Blogging can kill you.  Two bloggers have died from blogging according to the NY Times

Bloggers are dying out there people.  I mean, look at us poor SEO Chicks!  Look at the toll blogging has exacted from us – we’re often silent, recovering from near death.  I’m telling you, this blogging business is a dangerous thing.  Look at that empty tea cup next to me!  I could dehydrate!  I could starve to death, trapped on the couch under the laptop weakened from dehydration by lack of tea!  SOMEONE QUICK GET ME SOME CHOCOLATE!

Yes, blogging can be deadly and as such, those of us in the profession apparently need a rescue pack.  None other than the drugs giant Bayer has recognised the plight of bloggers and have created a bloggers relief pack.  You can pick one up from the Berocca Blogger Relief Pack page

So, what can prevent the deaths of thousands of bloggers?  Killing other things it seems.  Stabbing the “Dead Fred Pen Holder” with the provided Berocca pen and leaving it there, sticking out of it has a kind of sick satisfaction about it.  Getting in to the packet was so difficult, I was able to vent some righteous indignation about someone being _wrong_ on the internet while trying to open it.

Frustration is, however, more likely to lead to death and so the lovely Berocca folk have provided an anti-stress squishy ball with a happy face so you can crush the heads of all those annoyingly chirpy people who seem to plague those of us who are hung over.  You are meant to crush their head by squishing the ball in your hand and not by assaulting them with it I did find out.  Sorry.

Another toy for helping us bloggers relax is a never-ending bubble wrap keychain.  You can pop bubble wrap to your hearts content.  In fact, I have found it extremely effective at removing those annoyingly chirpy people from the general vicinity of my person.  Apparently bubble wrap and chirpy people are natural enemies.

Just in case you are blogging at work in order to try and utilise an environment where being fed while stationary is a possibility, there is another toy to play with.  It’s a panic button which throws up an excel spreadsheet which pops up when you hit the button in response to the boss getting close to your computer.  That way you’ll never again be caught surfing for porn blogging at work ever again.

Of course, the central point of this kit is the branded Berocca glass and a pack of Berocca to help keep Britain blogging.  I have to admit to some mild trepidation at consuming the vivid orange liquid concoction however after a night of heavy drinking blogging I was in need of some instant relief.  Possibly not as instant as I could have wished for but better than water or anything else I’d tried.

So why not do what I did and go and sign up for one of these blogger relief packs?  Heck, why not spread the word around – the toys are great fun and the Berocca’s not bad either!  Thanks for the chocolate… nomnomnom…

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